NFL Playoff Simulation

January 17, 2009
Wacko for Flacco doesn't get past AFC Championship

Wacko for Flacco doesn't get past AFC Championship

With the Conference Championships on the horizon, a playoff simulation using Madden 09 seemed mandatory. 

NFC Championship: Eagles over Cardinals, 20-17 in Overtime.

AFC Championship: Steelers over Ravens, 10-3.

Superbowl: Eagles over Steelers, 17-10.

If you ain’t a Gator, you’re Gator Bait

January 9, 2009
I will Always Love You~ Whitney Houston

Play Music: I will Always Love You~ Whitney Houston

The Florida Gators are the National Champions.  BAAAAAAAH! Dah Na Na Na Na, Go GATORS!  Yes, we got sick of hearing that band all night long but we must give the Florida Gators their props.  The Gators SEC defense proved to be too tough for the prolific Big 12 offense of Oklahoma, taking home the Sears Trophy with a 24 – 14 victory.  The winners exuded confidence from the start, as Urban Meyer paced the sideline with a stoic look, all while Bob Stoops looked like he forgot 100,000 people were going to be in the stadium.

This game was one of the better BCS Championships in recent memory despite being falsely advertised as a shootout style game, of which the over-under hovered around 70.  Heisman QB’s, Bradford and Tebow each threw 2 first half picks despite only throwing a combined 8 all year long and  Oklahoma was held to 14 points after averaging 63 a clip during the regular season.

Tim Tebow shrugged off two first half interceptions, and willed his team to victory, finishing with 231 passing yards, Two TD’s.  Oh not to mention the 109 yards he reeled off on the ground.  Percy Harvin, solidified his draft status with 122 rushing yards on only 9 carries. Oklahoma could have changed the landscape of this game in the first half but a couple of second quarter goal line stands by the Gator defense, left an open stage for Tebow, and of course he capitalized.  We should have known Tebow would deliver, after essentially guaranteeing that the Gators would not be stopped for the remainder of the season.  Will power.

We know Tebow and his Gators receive a lot of “pub” and most often times to a nauseating extent but when it is all said and done, Tim Tebow might be one of, it not, THE greatest college football player of all time, as his personal destiny has manifested itself right before the country’s eyes.

We will be looking forward to next year when Tebow will likely return for his Senior season.  We also may get a chance to see Bradford come back as well, due to his sub-par performance on the biggest stage.  If that happens, expect next year’s preseason rankings to have Florida on top of the list followed by Oklahoma.

OT: Fantasy Football is fun

December 29, 2008

While this site is not intended to boast about our infrequent accomplishments, we think a little self-aggrandizing is OK when it involves winning your fantasy football league.

I (Nick) am pretty proud of my “Everything Bagel” boys.  I had no business winning this league (note my week 17 lineup) nor did I even deserve to be in the playoffs. But rules are rules and I bent them as necessary.  

There was adversity aplenty:  Tom Brady and Braylon Edwards chosen in rounds one and two respectivly, the weathering of a Steven Jackson mid-season vacation, and the desperate decision to start Tashard Choice and Jamaaaaaaaaaal Charles in the finals.

Many thanks to the three-round playoff system, Philip Rivers, one point per reception and Jeff Fisher’s goal line offense. Mild apoligies to my friend “Im a F—– Soljuh.” Good luck lamenting your blown fantasy season and the underacheiving Cleveland Browns.  

Please send me my check ASAP.


Tebow always gets two, can he on Saturday?

December 12, 2008
Does he do anything poorly?

You can be jealous, Timmy-boy always takes home two.  There was no difference on Thursday night at the 2008 College Football Awards.  Tebow won his second consecutive Maxwell Award.  Only one other player in college football history can stake that claim, Johnny Lattner.  That doesn’t mean anything to us, were 24, so basically Tebow is the first to accomplish this.  If he hasn’t made you throw up yet, being so perfect, Timmy was also the recipient of the Disney Spirit Award.

Logic would suggest that the best all-around college football player, who also plays quarterback, would by default be crowned top quarterback as well…but Lee Corso fires a pencil accompanied by “Not so fast my friend!” Sam Bradford of the Oklahoma Sooners walked up to the podium for the Davey O’Brien Award, and Colt McCoy received the Walter Camp Award Player of the Year Award.

It’s an exact science this stuff.

So as it stands we have Tebow is good at everything, Bradford is the best quarterback and McCoy is the best player.

Yes, an exact science.

Heisman Trophy Football

Now all eyes turn to Saturday night at the New York Athletic club. Tebow will be going for his second consecutive Heisman Award.  Bradford and McCoy are just excited to be engulfed by Times Square.

Please buy your tissues now you proud parents.

Quickie Recap 12.6: No Percy no problem, Big 10 earns some respect

December 7, 2008

Rulers of the South

Rulers of the South

Oh what a dreary day to be a ‘Bama fan; a waste of a resurgent season, in our opinion. Granted they exceeded expectations, but this is where college football becomes irritating, We’re glad we have no deeply rooted allegiances and can instead crush Bud heavies every Saturday, all while watching 118 programs slowly widdle away like a slug doused with salt.

‘Bama can now likely look forward to a Sugar Bowl match-up with non-BCS children, Utah or Bosie State. Boring.<a name=”5476386886″></a>

In the other quasi-semifinal, Bob Stoops continues to proves he’s the biggest bully in college football by putting up 60+ points for the fifth consecutive game. It was over before it started and to us, Chase Daniels looked disinterested.

So it’s most likely going to be the Sooners vs. Gators for in the BCS Championship Game. Start your fact checking now Mr. Thom Brennaman.


In roundball, the Big 10 may have gained some respect with two upset victories…

Meeeechigan’s Deshawn Sims had his shining moment, leading all with 28 in a win over the Dukies, who played like absolute sissies. Coach K’s boys didn’t get to the free throw line even once in the first half, and shot 2-18 behind the new arc. The Wolverines now have two signature wins (UCLA) to hang their hat on come March.

No football left in South Bend? No problem! There’s still reason to be pissed off…as the Buckeyes take down the Irish in Indy. Luke Harangody is back and looking healthy, but the story here is Ohio State’s Evan Turner. He also led all scorers with 28, and has basically emegred as the team’s go-to-guy.

One final game of note, attention-seeking Marquette protects their house, with a win over identity-seeking Wisconsin. Both of these teams have talent but right now aren’t really getting any chatter, especially from us.

Quickie (football) Recap 11.23: Penn St wins Big10, Big12 South gets confusing

November 23, 2008
Sam Bradford now has a strong case to win the Heisman

Sam Bradford now has a strong case for the Heisman

The Oklahoma Sooners created a three way tie for the Big 12 South with their impressive 65-21 beat down of #2 Texas Tech on Saturday night in Norman, Oklahoma. So now that Texas beat Oklahoma, Texas Tech beat Texas and Oklahoma beat Texas Tech, the water gets a little murky. Do not forget that there is still one week left in the season and all three teams don’t play “roll-overs.”

Texas will host Texas A&M in their annual Thanksgiving weekend game.

Oklahoma travels to hostile Stillwater for the Bedlam Game.

Texas Tech gets the mediocre Baylor Bears.

Everyone seems to be looking past Chase Daniels (one of Preseason favorites for Heisman) and his Tigers from Missouri, who await whichever team floats to the top of the Big 12 South. Nothing is a given.

In the Big 10, Penn State rolls on Michigan State, 49-18 in State College. Everyone gets a rose!!! When do we get rid of that? We think someone killed that whole Sports Illustrated Cover pic. With the win the Nittany Lions assured themselves a trip to Pasadena for the Rose Bowl, with a possible rematch against Oregon State and NOT Southern California; Oregon State traveled to Penn State on September 6th, 45-14 Nittany lions. If Oregon State takes care of business next week at home vs. the #24 Oregon Ducks, then they are in the Rose Bowl and USC will be in another BCS game (thank goodness, we don’t know if we can stand another Big 10 vs USC game in Pasadena for the Trojan Invitational).

I (Matt) officially am done talking about Notre Dame, I’ll quietly hang to every snap of the football in which they are involved but you will no longer need to listen to me…until they show me something (at USC next week, wouldn’t that be nice?)

OT: “The Lazer Show” Takes Home AL MVP

November 18, 2008
He's undoubtedly cooler than your second baseman

He's undoubtedly cooler than your team's second baseman

Dustin Pedroia, the sweetest 2nd baseman in recent memory, is your American League MVP. We’re effing ecstatic. This guy is absolutely hysterical, he can bat nearly anywhere in the line-up, and he manages to have a decent looking significant other despite a severe balding problem.

This will serve as somewhat of a consolation for losing the ALCS to the lame Tampa Bay Rays. We’re still pretty ticked about that, although we’re still the most envied sports city in America.